I awoke with an inner push hampering my joy. The feeling was both familiar and foreign. Familiar to a former self perception but foreign to who I am today. A deep awareness of the legitimacy of my union with Christ is beginning to interpret old thought patterns as intruders.
The “push” said it wasn’t enough to enjoy writing, communing with the Lord, or to post a few pieces of poetry on a website. The “push” insisted the site must have greater purpose (measured by profitability or popularity). I felt a goad to generate a dynamic site safeguarded against static content.
The domain was a gift from Michael, my husband. He wanted my creative expression to have an outlet. The “push” perverted the purity of his gift by suggesting a moral obligation to write as proof of my worth. This “push” was coming from the wrong source, no doubt.
Recognition was quick; the voice wasn’t coming from my Lord and therefore it wasn’t for me. I am not currently compelled to promote myself and yet am no less a visionary. I have permission to keep it simple. I am not where others may be – but to dismiss comparison is to gain the confidence to be myself. I will dismantle all idolatry, tear down each graven image, and allow my individuality in Christ to generate His unique expression through me!